Wisdom Wednesday: How do you get over “Church Hurt?”

“Church hurt” is uniquely painful. One of the reasons is because in Church we trust wholeheartedly without pretense or reservation. Church is suppose to be a safe place; and when it’s not, we are completely blindsided and caught off guard.

We never expect to be betrayed, misused, and abused by those who proclaim to love Jesus and love us. When we are hurt by those we love and trust, it causes trauma and pain. It can lead us to blame God and turn our back on Him and His Church.

If this is where you are, I write this post to encourage you. I don’t know what happened, but I know God wants to see you through it.

Things to Do

1. If you have not already done so, leave any “church” that is abusing and misusing you. Protect yourself and leave. Any form of abuse or action, that violates the Word of God, is never God’s will. Irregardless of what anyone says, it is sin and it grieves God.

2. God did not approve or allow someone to abuse you. Don’t blame God for what a human-being did to you. God did not abuse, misuse, or betray you. That person did, not God. Turn away from that person but run to God.

3. Bring God your trauma and pain. Tell Him what happened. Ask Him to heal you. Ask Him to show you what that looks like for you. Is it going to therapy? Is it confiding in someone you trust? Is it sitting before God, in His presence, letting Him heal those broken places.

4. Ask God to help you forgive. Sometimes people hurt us so badly that we can’t forgive in our own strength. We need supernatural help and that’s okay. God wants us to forgive (Matthew 6:15), so He will help us. Forgiveness frees you and unforgiveness keeps you bound and bitter.

Remember that the Church is full of people who are in need of a Physician. Jesus said that those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. He did not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance (Matthew 9:12). Also, remember that even in our local churches there are those who have entered in that are not a part of the flock of Christ. Thus, protect yourself, love, extend grace, and forgive.

Be blessed and encouraged! ❤